(Click here if you can't see the above clip on your outdated browser…)
Hello and welcome back to a whole new season of Eurovision Apocalypse! We've been a little slack so far this season, but, y'know, life stuff. But with the songs beginning to trickle in we thought we'd better get back on the Apocalypse bike and show you some of the best and worst and weirdest of all the usual suspects.
And where better to start than with the first artist to declare their interest in Eurovision - the most curious Tommy Cash!
Now, you know that thing you do where there's a left field artist from one of the smaller countries who you've loved for years and have always wished they'd lower themselves to have a stab at a Eurovision event? Well we've been wanting that of this fella for flipping years, but figured that ETV would never have the nerve to even think about it. Yeah, they like to tease with the weird and less usual, but could they ever truly trust a loose cannon as deeply creative and unhinged as Cash? Even when he started describing himself as "Eurovision winner 2025" we thought it was just a massive in joke. Just take a look at some of his past videos to see why we thought it would never happen! But make sure there are no children, nans or small animals in easy view.
But then the Eesti Laul line up was announced and it was all true! Heck, whatever was this song going to be like? You can't imagine the excitement and trepidation in Apocalypse Towers as we sat down to watch it - only to be met with a big "Oh. Was that it?" when we finally got through it's poppy, lilty running time. I can't pretend to not being just a smudge disappointed. I mean, it's got plenty of cracking Italianate cliche's running through it that'll annoy all the right people. And you just know that the on stage performance of this is going to be one of the most maximum things you're likely to see all year, but, y'know, when he's just put out a video like the one he just has for his song Untz Untz (and seriously, put a blanket over the budgie cage if you watch it), well you can understand me wanting just that little bit more.
But then a curious thing happened. I showed it to Mrs A, who knew little of Mr C's track record, and about a minute in she turned to me and said "Get a bet on - that's winning the whole thing!" Y'see, I might know all about Tommy's extreme musical history, but Mrs A - along with the vast masses of watching TV folks - won't have the faintest clue about what they haven't seen, only the happy funtimes song in front of them, and that's what really counts.
And while it's great that Estonia have finally sent a critically acclaimed international artist to the Eesti Laul stage, we kind of fear how this one is going to go. He'll storm though the early voting, despite a few painfully low votes from some of the more elderly just members, only to be beaten in the superfinal by a dough-faced girl from a casting show, or a lantern-jawed boy in a brown suede coat. It's a story as old as time.
Come on Estonia, you've got one job…
And where better to start than with the first artist to declare their interest in Eurovision - the most curious Tommy Cash!
Now, you know that thing you do where there's a left field artist from one of the smaller countries who you've loved for years and have always wished they'd lower themselves to have a stab at a Eurovision event? Well we've been wanting that of this fella for flipping years, but figured that ETV would never have the nerve to even think about it. Yeah, they like to tease with the weird and less usual, but could they ever truly trust a loose cannon as deeply creative and unhinged as Cash? Even when he started describing himself as "Eurovision winner 2025" we thought it was just a massive in joke. Just take a look at some of his past videos to see why we thought it would never happen! But make sure there are no children, nans or small animals in easy view.
But then the Eesti Laul line up was announced and it was all true! Heck, whatever was this song going to be like? You can't imagine the excitement and trepidation in Apocalypse Towers as we sat down to watch it - only to be met with a big "Oh. Was that it?" when we finally got through it's poppy, lilty running time. I can't pretend to not being just a smudge disappointed. I mean, it's got plenty of cracking Italianate cliche's running through it that'll annoy all the right people. And you just know that the on stage performance of this is going to be one of the most maximum things you're likely to see all year, but, y'know, when he's just put out a video like the one he just has for his song Untz Untz (and seriously, put a blanket over the budgie cage if you watch it), well you can understand me wanting just that little bit more.
But then a curious thing happened. I showed it to Mrs A, who knew little of Mr C's track record, and about a minute in she turned to me and said "Get a bet on - that's winning the whole thing!" Y'see, I might know all about Tommy's extreme musical history, but Mrs A - along with the vast masses of watching TV folks - won't have the faintest clue about what they haven't seen, only the happy funtimes song in front of them, and that's what really counts.
And while it's great that Estonia have finally sent a critically acclaimed international artist to the Eesti Laul stage, we kind of fear how this one is going to go. He'll storm though the early voting, despite a few painfully low votes from some of the more elderly just members, only to be beaten in the superfinal by a dough-faced girl from a casting show, or a lantern-jawed boy in a brown suede coat. It's a story as old as time.
Come on Estonia, you've got one job…
Stuff Fikmas, your first post every year is when the season truly begins!
ReplyDeleteGawd bless your lovely heart sir!
Delete